Monday, August 1, 2016

Review: If My Husband Would Change, I'd Be Happy

If My Husband Would Change, I’d Be Happy
By Rhonda Stoppe
Harvest House, 2015


Like most brides on their wedding day, you no doubt were filled with love for your husband and the hope of a happy life together.

But perhaps today, as the realities of life together have settled in, those happy expectations are going unfulfilled. And it's tempting to think, "If only my husband would change, I'd be happy."

That myth is but one of many that Rhonda Stoppe dispels in her easy-to-read exploration of what it takes to experience a truly happy marriage. In the process, she addresses such important topics as . . .

-understanding your husband's need for your unconditional respect
-rekindling the love that drew you to your husband in the first place
-refusing to believe the lie that you'd be happier married to someone else
-learning to be content in the midst of financial struggles
-thinking about sex from a biblical worldview

If you desire to rekindle the love and hope you felt on your wedding day, this book will go a long way toward making that dream come true.

Contains discussion questions and personal reflections at the end of each chapter.

Purchase a copy:

My thoughts

After the honeymoon, when the wedding gifts are in their proper place and life begins to happen, often the glorious experiences fade into the endless routines of to-do lists, juggling finances, and learning to serve one another.

In an engaging, conversational and often humorous style, Rhonda Stoppe speaks straight from her heart into the reader’s heart. It’s just like she was sitting across the table, the two of us enjoying our morning coffee. If My Husband Would Change, I’d Be Happy is relevant, convicting – and entertaining. It’s a lifesaver if you’re hurting in your marriage, and an extremely helpful resource if you’re not. Bottom line … this book can be helpful to wives in all stages of marriage.

The book’s subtitle is key here – “and Other Myths Wives Believe.” I’m always amazed at how society’s ways subtly creep into our marriages, pulling us away from God’s ideal. Rhonda addresses twelve myths, drawing from personal experience and Scripture. In addition to the title myth, here is a sampling of others . . .

I Will Respect Him When He Earns My Respect
I Would Be Happier Married to Someone Else
All He Wants Is Sex
Happily-Ever-After Is a Fairy Tale

Each chapter/myth ends with a “thinking it through” and “living it out” section. Also, a special touch that I loved was the inclusion of her husband’s insights throughout.

Some women might not buy into the “husband as head of the family” concept, but I found it to be solidly based on Scripture – and the fact that being head of the family does not equate dictatorship. Rhonda doesn’t really hold anything back and her godly wisdom shines through. I especially appreciated her encouragement to extend grace and even found it pretty convicting: “Settle in your mind how you plan to respond with forgiveness before an infraction occurs. And be ready to offer the same grace to you husband that you would want from him in the times that you disappoint him.”

I also thought Rhonda hit the nail on the head with the reminder that we have to love God more than our husbands. This is a great quote to take to heart . . .

God made you to long for intimacy with Him – to delight in Him. So any other relationship that you pursue to fill the void only God can fill will always come up short.

If My Husband Would Change, I’d Be Happy is an exceptional book that would work well for personal or small group study – and I plan on giving it as wedding gifts.

Highly recommended.


Rhonda Stoppe is the No Regrets Woman. She is an author and speaker dedicated to helping women live life with no regrets.

With more than 20 years' experience as a mom, mentor, and pastor's wife, Rhonda's wisdom and experience helps women discover significance in God and His specific purpose for their lives, connect biblical principles to everyday decisions, develop a loving marriage that others dream about, and influence the next generation by raising children with integrity.

Thank you to Litfuse Publicity for providing a copy of this book in exchange for my honest review.

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  1. great review, Carole! I love your idea of giving this book as a wedding gift.

  2. Carole, I enjoyed your review and what a wonderful reminder that our husbands are the heads of our homes. I think this book sounds like a really good read for me. Thanks for sharing your thoughts